As writers, we are all often asked, “why do you write?” As a former dancer, and as a model I ask, “why do we do anything artistic?”
Personally, I create art to express myself. I’m one of those obnoxious people who never shuts up, and whose mind is always going a million miles a second (thank goodness for sleeping pills!). I can express myself through living sculptures (dance), intricate photographs (modeling), and the written word.
I also create art because I love to make people think. I want people to look at things from a different perspective; to challenge society; to go against the grain. There is no greater reward than hearing someone say, “Huh,” as they scratch their head, and walk away. You know they’ll be thinking about that art for days, weeks, maybe even years to come! THAT is the definition of art, in my mind.
As well, I create because if I don’t, I am haunted. My characters will haunt me; I cannot listen to ANY music without seeing dancers and movement(s) in my head; images are constantly flashing in my brain as new ideas to try for a shoot. My “creativity” haunts me. I have to say, though, that the characters I write about are the worst. They’re the ones who won’t let me sleep. If they do, I’m often dreaming of them. They literally infiltrate my life!
I stopped writing fiction for about 15 years, and found reprieve from my fictional hauntings. In 2006, I saw this small, petite blonde girl in a pizza parlor, and thus the stories for Loving Her came about (Liz and Jen had been in my head for years but were homeless until I decided to place them with everyone else in this collection). Although I was extremely busy with other things, the girls from Loving Her reminded me of their presence on occasion. They wanted me to know that they were far from dead. I had best do something with them, else I’d never sleep again! So, I finished the stories, and was EXTREMELY fortunate that Vanilla Heart Publishing agreed to take on such an unusual project, and from a no-name newer author (I’ve been published many times since I was 17, but again, that was all non-fiction).
Then came Imperfect. Battling a dark period in my own life, and using a specific actress as a muse, I came up with this tragic story. It’s still in the works, but will be out later this year. No, I have not been sleeping well thanks to these new characters.
I don’t know what the future holds for me as a writer, dancer, or model. I just like to hope that I have contributed positively to the artistic and creative worlds. Even if I made just one person stop and think, then I did my job well.